My grand daughter, Anne, is getting married in August so there's a lot of wedding party talk in our family. Here's the question: What would you change about your wedding day if you could do it over again? What advice do you have for Anne?
1. In regards to all reception decorating and food: a. Hire it out. b. If you can't pay someone else to be in charge, keep it simple. For example, don't have a screaming breakdown at midnight the night before your morning wedding because nothing is coming together and the church gym still looks like a gym and not the magical wonderland of your dreams. c. Better yet, get Louise to do it. Louise does everything.
I would not change a thing about our wedding, some 28 years ago, except the ice storm.
Our daughter is getting married in 5 weeks! I would tell your granddaughter the same thing I discuss with our two daughters: break with the contemporary trends and focus on simplicity and elegance.
I would not give in to my mother's insistence that we open our wedding gifts before leaving for our honeymoon. I was too tired, but I think she enjoyed it.
Advice: most of it doesn't matter, so just have fun, do what feels best in the moment and take it as it comes.
I wouldn't have a line at my reception. I would just have a small, delicious dinner with family and close friends instead of a traditional reception in a church gym. If I had to have a reception, I would make it an open house at home. I would get married in the late afternoon instead of morning. I would splurge on a really good photographer, rather than just asking a family friend to do it as a favor. I would write down all the photos I want and put someone in charge of arranging them. I would not be late to the temple because of a hair crisis. Congrats and good luck to Anne!
Get the dress of your dreams. Make sure to have an outstanding photographer. Keep the reception elegant and simple and blow the big bucks on a honeymoon - go big! Congratulations!!!!
I wouldn't change much - it was a beautiful day. I wish we would have splurged a little more on a honeymoon and gone somewhere amazing. We didn't think we had enough time/money - but we probably could have figured it out if we thought it through a little better.
Yes to: Great photographer Open House or simple reception Skip the bridesmaids/groomsmen/reception line Awesome honeymoon (Don't even think of going to an amusement park. Save Disney for when you have kids.)
We did one great thing that we loved: we had both families over for a really simple dinner the night before AND we invited the sealer. It meant that we did get some time to spend with the families, because the wedding day itself was spent with the temple folk, the photographer, and the 100's of people who came to the reception.
Looking back there are only two things I would change: One, pay for someone to do the bridal party's hair and nails - pedicures too! Second, go on a honeymoon - we paid for most of our wedding, except for the food, and we were poor students so we couldn't afford a honeymoon we had to find jobs and a place to live instead. Other than that we had a great time and we are still having it 25 years later! Best of wishes to Anne and her man - may they have a wonderful day and just enjoy it, and may it continue for the rest of their lives!
Don't have your reception inside the Lion House. I got stuck in a line and after the guests left the room I was in I never saw them again. I also agree with the photographer suggestions. I have no great pictures of my decorations or cake. I would like to remember what they looked like after spending so much money. My favorite wedding I attended had about 80 guests and was a full-on dinner and party, black tie. So much fun. Good luck to Anne.
Avoid having an early morning ceremony. If there is one thing to splurge on, it's a great photographer - professional and reputable-not the friend majoring in photography who needs to add to her portfolio. Just invite the people you love the most and want to share your special day (nobody cares about dad's long-lost friend in elementary school). And don't forget the Dutch Dance! Congrats, Anne!
I would say elope. It would save a lot of hassle and offend everyone evenly. (Maybe that was just a problem for us.)
If you insist on a wedding, let other people be in charge of decorating and such. Even if it's not professional. My sisters took care of all of that for me and it made the day go so much better.
I would also agree that you should just invite people you care about. If I did it again, which I certainly have no intention of ever doing, I wouldn't invite my parents' acquaintances whom I'd never met. I think this is better for everyone: I don't have to act happy to see someone I've never met, they don't have to feel obligated to buy a gift for the daughter of an acquaintance. Win-win.
Choose the photographer based on his/her personality and your gut feelings, not just the quality of photos or cost of the package. You'll be working with this person all day. My photographer bullied us and almost made me cry on my wedding day before we even left the temple, and I think of that incident every time I look at my pictures. I'm NOT a bridezilla, either. Now that I'm more savvy about Internet reviews, I find that a lot of people have said the same thing about him.
My Sage Wedding Advice To Louise's Granddaughter:
ReplyDelete1. In regards to all reception decorating and food:
a. Hire it out.
b. If you can't pay someone else to be in charge, keep it simple. For example, don't have a screaming breakdown at midnight the night before your morning wedding because nothing is coming together and the church gym still looks like a gym and not the magical wonderland of your dreams.
c. Better yet, get Louise to do it. Louise does everything.
I would not change a thing about our wedding, some 28 years ago, except the ice storm.
ReplyDeleteOur daughter is getting married in 5 weeks! I would tell your granddaughter the same thing I discuss with our two daughters: break with the contemporary trends and focus on simplicity and elegance.
I would not give in to my mother's insistence that we open our wedding gifts before leaving for our honeymoon. I was too tired, but I think she enjoyed it.
ReplyDeleteAdvice: most of it doesn't matter, so just have fun, do what feels best in the moment and take it as it comes.
I wouldn't have a line at my reception. I would just have a small, delicious dinner with family and close friends instead of a traditional reception in a church gym. If I had to have a reception, I would make it an open house at home. I would get married in the late afternoon instead of morning. I would splurge on a really good photographer, rather than just asking a family friend to do it as a favor. I would write down all the photos I want and put someone in charge of arranging them. I would not be late to the temple because of a hair crisis. Congrats and good luck to Anne!
ReplyDeleteGet the dress of your dreams. Make sure to have an outstanding photographer. Keep the reception elegant and simple and blow the big bucks on a honeymoon - go big! Congratulations!!!!
ReplyDeleteDon't let a friend who is a self proclaimed "really good photographer" take your pictures. Get a professional.
ReplyDeleteElope!
ReplyDeletePhotographer. Get a good one, not just some "photographer" from the stake who is cheap.
ReplyDeleteI wouldn't change much - it was a beautiful day. I wish we would have splurged a little more on a honeymoon and gone somewhere amazing. We didn't think we had enough time/money - but we probably could have figured it out if we thought it through a little better.
ReplyDeleteOoooh....these are such great suggestions!
ReplyDeleteYes to:
Great photographer
Open House or simple reception
Skip the bridesmaids/groomsmen/reception line
Awesome honeymoon (Don't even think of going to an amusement park. Save Disney for when you have kids.)
We did one great thing that we loved: we had both families over for a really simple dinner the night before AND we invited the sealer. It meant that we did get some time to spend with the families, because the wedding day itself was spent with the temple folk, the photographer, and the 100's of people who came to the reception.
ReplyDeleteLooking back there are only two things I would change:
ReplyDeleteOne, pay for someone to do the bridal party's hair and nails - pedicures too!
Second, go on a honeymoon - we paid for most of our wedding, except for the food, and we were poor students so we couldn't afford a honeymoon we had to find jobs and a place to live instead. Other than that we had a great time and we are still having it 25 years later! Best of wishes to Anne and her man - may they have a wonderful day and just enjoy it, and may it continue for the rest of their lives!
Don't have your reception inside the Lion House. I got stuck in a line and after the guests left the room I was in I never saw them again. I also agree with the photographer suggestions. I have no great pictures of my decorations or cake. I would like to remember what they looked like after spending so much money.
ReplyDeleteMy favorite wedding I attended had about 80 guests and was a full-on dinner and party, black tie. So much fun. Good luck to Anne.
Avoid having an early morning ceremony. If there is one thing to splurge on, it's a great photographer - professional and reputable-not the friend majoring in photography who needs to add to her portfolio. Just invite the people you love the most and want to share your special day (nobody cares about dad's long-lost friend in elementary school). And don't forget the Dutch Dance! Congrats, Anne!
ReplyDeleteI shouldn't put in a Part II response, but I am.
ReplyDeleteMuch talk about photographers; I say more candid shots, and many less posed photo sessions.
That's all.
We had clowns, carnival games, swimming, popcorn, hotdog machines, face-painting, and jumping houses at my reception.
ReplyDeleteI've only ever regretted the clowns.
I would say elope. It would save a lot of hassle and offend everyone evenly. (Maybe that was just a problem for us.)
ReplyDeleteIf you insist on a wedding, let other people be in charge of decorating and such. Even if it's not professional. My sisters took care of all of that for me and it made the day go so much better.
I would also agree that you should just invite people you care about. If I did it again, which I certainly have no intention of ever doing, I wouldn't invite my parents' acquaintances whom I'd never met. I think this is better for everyone: I don't have to act happy to see someone I've never met, they don't have to feel obligated to buy a gift for the daughter of an acquaintance. Win-win.
Choose the photographer based on his/her personality and your gut feelings, not just the quality of photos or cost of the package. You'll be working with this person all day. My photographer bullied us and almost made me cry on my wedding day before we even left the temple, and I think of that incident every time I look at my pictures. I'm NOT a bridezilla, either. Now that I'm more savvy about Internet reviews, I find that a lot of people have said the same thing about him.
ReplyDelete