Tuesday, September 8, 2015

A whispered birthday

Today, Ann and I finished reading our book aloud, and then she took me to lunch for my birthday, which is later this week.  Neither one of us could speak English to the waitress.  I'm not kidding.  We had to restate our order about seven times and I was beginning to think this woman was really stupid. It turned out we were the stupid ones who couldn't read the menu.

I really enjoy these moments with Ann.

Some years, I make it clear to everyone that I want to know it's my birthday.  I want a celebration and presents and hand-made cards and fireworks.

This is not one of those years.  This year I want it low key.  As in whisper the birthday song to me. Softer, softer.  I can still hear you!  No hoopla. No video to show how cute I've been all my life.

It has nothing to do with my age--at least, I don't think it does--I'm turning 73. So far, so good.

This is the birthday I want this year: a fine chocolate cake with really thick butter frosting and a glass of milk. Let me beat you at arm wrestling. That would be good.

Kiddies can blow out the candles.

Thursday, September 3, 2015

Telling it like it is

 Ann Cannon and I have written this book modeling memoir writing.  Honestly, we think we're pretty funny and even wise sometimes.  And then, too, people generally like us.  Not everyone, but generally speaking, people like us.

So we were surprised when the first publisher we sent it to, didn't want it.

Maybe the book wasn't as good as we thought.  Maybe we were just a couple of deluded has-beens.  It happens.

We decided to read the book aloud to each other.  She reads my essays, and I read hers.  Last Tuesday, she read this sentence from one of my essays:

     "I tasted my mother's butt and wanted some on my toast."

We sat in a public area and drew many stares when we fell apart laughing.

"Do you think that sentence kept us from selling the book?" I asked between gasps.

We read it aloud again. More laughing.

Actually, I was writing about my mother being the only member in our large family, who got to eat butter, and realizing that I liked her butter better than our margarine.

I don't know.  Maybe some typing errors should remain as they are.  A good laugh really cleans the sinuses.

Tuesday, September 1, 2015

The sisters learn Parcheesi

My sisters came over last night for card night. Actually, Judy couldn't come so Jill, Toni's daughter, came instead.  Now that she lives in Colorado, we get to see more of her.  Yesterday, she took her oldest daughter to BYU, so this was the end of a tearful day for her.

A good time to beat her up by teaching her Parcheesi.  We played one round of Golf and moved to Parcheesi.  It plodded along slowly, because they were all learning.  When I told them that if they got three doubles in a row, they had to move the pawn closest to home back to the beginning, they laughed and said, "As if that happens!"  Ha ha ha ha ha.

It happened several times amid screams.

Janie called from Seattle and we set her on "speaker" and laid her on the table where occasionally we ignored her when something big in the game happened.

She told this story.  She sent Gerard, our brother, a birthday card and signed it "your favorite sister." Followed by, "Give me a call."

She gets a call from him and he says, "Louise, is that you?"

We ate chocolate silk pie. Marilyn won the Parcheesi.

When I got into bed, Tom had found an article online written by an elementary teacher who uses Parcheesi to teach Math and Probabilities.  The chance of getting three doubles in a row  is one in 216 rolls.

I wouldn't get on an airplane if those were the odds for crashing.

Sunday, August 30, 2015

Good-bye summer; Good-bye apostasy.

So this has been a happy summer for me: breakfasts with Erica and teenagers, Yellowstone Park, falling in love with Olive and Oscar, marrying Rian and Tate, Bear Lake and, of course, long bouts of Parcheesi with the old man.  I bid it adieu cheerfully, because I'm tired of sweating like a pig and look forward to cooler weather.

And good-bye to apostasy. We took a sabbatical from church, but now we're back and our friends greeted us as if we'd never been gone, which is one of those really good things about church. Thank you, Holly, for blessing my life ever since I've known you but especially today.

And thank you, Sam, for that extraordinary talk of last week at your ward.

At the end of the week I crumbled to pieces with angst and stayed in bed for two days.  Why does this even surprise me anymore?  The wheels on the bus go round and round.

Home teachers came this afternoon.  That cute Justin hugged me three times.  He's fifteen!  And he hugs me! He's going to be a scientist of some kind and he's so articulate about his dreams.  I still believe our children and grand children can save this world with their kindness and their immense and amazing human brains.  Go, kids, go!

Tuesday, August 25, 2015

Today at Claire's

I met with Ann today and she had two earrings in one ear.  So cheering! She and I actually got our second piercings years ago wanting to be like Denna Hales, our neighbor, in every way.  Then Gordon B. Hinckley announced that one piercing was enough and, of course, BYU made it an immediate rule. I was teaching there, and I let those holes grow in, although, I have to say that I think President Hinckley was just talking off the top of his head and hadn't thought about it for two minutes.

Then a couple of younger bloggers had shown their young daughters with new earrings from Claire's in time for the first day of school.  It's been ten years since I retired, and I have missed those first days of class, which are a total high.

I needed to go to Claire's for a little lift. I needed a second earring.  So I had them repierced and now I have a pearl and a zircon in each ear.  And I have an added bounce in my step.

Next: tattoos.  What do you think, Ann?

Monday, August 24, 2015

Mission Impossible: Rogue Nation was brill

As much as I dislike reading about Tom Cruise's personal life, I really like the MISSION IMPOSSIBLE movies. Tom (my Tom) and I went to the most recent one (numero cinco) last Saturday night, and I thought it was the best of the series.

Cruise looks terrific at sixty-one.  No easy feat.  Too much face work looks terrible, and at the same time we don't want him to look sixty-one either. He's allowed for a little aging around the eyes but there's no bagginess anywhere.  And he must work out hours a day to have that musculature.

The script was smart, tense and humorous.  And I liked the addition of Alec Baldwin as head of the CIA.  Now that I think about it, I like most Tom Cruise movies. I just don't like Tom Cruise.

Remember when Robert Redford had his eyes done? Terrible! I think I noticed it in THE CLEARING, which I liked. They look more normal now.  Gravity works its mysterious magic.

Friday, August 21, 2015

When there's only vanilla ice cream in the freezer

Neither Tom nor I would buy vanilla ice cream unless it was a condiment for a fruit pie.  I came home from having lunch with friends in Ogden and was hoping for Chocolate Almond or even Mint Chocolate Chip and, preferably, Rocky Road.

There it was: Vanilla. So disappointing. Even as a second or third choice, I wasn't interested in vanilla ice cream, unless I could bury it in hot fudge topping. There is no hot fudge.

I think Sam and Sarah brought this Vanilla into the house last week for the birthday celebrations. It was a condiment for cake.

Why am I capitalizing ice cream flavors?

We have spent a few idyllic days in Bear Lake which was hidden behind smoky air.  I love to come out of Logan Canyon for that first view of the lake.  Could not see it. The west is filled with smoke from various fires.

But we could see the flock of wild turkeys outside of Jaggi's cabin along with their babies. And we sat on the deck and watched golfers at hole number nine.

Sitting for hours on a lonely beach to the south, we remembered who we were before we disappeared into the internet.

Tom painted.

I read two wonderful novels.

When Tom gets home, we will go out for ice cream cones.  He will have Butter Pecan and I will have Chocolate Chip.  Ice cream. It's soul food.

But not Vanilla.