During their Christmas holidays, our sons and families helped us move from a large apartment to a smaller one next door. In the last ten years, we have moved a lot, and needing their help made me anxious.
Anyway, they helped several hours one day, and when they could see that we were going to need more help, returned for a few hours the next day. They worked hard, and we couldn't have done it without them.
Between these two moving days, I lay awake and obsessed that perhaps they were planning an intervention on us as if we were a couple of drunks. (There's more than one way to be a drunk).
I imagined it to go something like this:
Alpha male son: "Sit down, we have something we want to say to you."
Baby son: "This has gone on way too long."
Nasty-minded son: "That's what she said."
Alpha male son: "This moving has got to stop. It's not responsible.
Baby son: "You've moved six times since 2005. Twice this year alone.
Nasty-minded son: Your life time moving average is every year and a half.
Me. We lived ten years in the Provo house and ten years on Second Avenue.
Nasty-minded son: You rented the Second Avenue house two and a half years to go live in Bracys house.
Alpha male son: You lived in that condo on Kennedy Drive a year and a half and sold it.
Me: I really miss the bubble.
Tom: We were going to NYC and live there forever.
Alpha male son: But you only lasted two years.
Me: I feel like such a failure.
Tom: Your mother was crippled.
Alpha male son: That's no excuse.
Baby son: We should take a jello break. Mom, do you want the red jello or the green jello?
Nasty-minded son: No, let's make chocolate chip cookies. I have it down to a science.
Baby son: Yeah, you set the cookie sheet on a baking pan so the bottoms don't burn."
Nasty-minded son: Take them out when they're still white. They stay soft that way.
Alpha male son: You guys are dufeses. Try and stay with the agenda.
Me to Baby son: Do your chicken walk. That always makes me laugh. Have you guys seen him do the chicken walk?
Tom: You wanna see my chicken walk, huh? I can make my chicken walk.
LOVE YOU, GUYS!