Wednesday, December 18, 2013

Las Vegas beat: Tom is hypnotized

Hypnotized audience members copy rag dolls actions

I've had to rethink LasVegas over the last few years: ever since Ed and Dede renewed their marriage vows with Elvis as justice of the peace in one of those little chapels on the strip.  Anything that makes you laugh that hard is just plain good for the soul.

Last night, we went to the ten o' clock show of Mark Savard Comedy Hypnotist.  Savard asked for thirty volunteers from the audience, and Tom went up much to the delight of Peggy, Jerry and me.
Savard seated the thirty volunteers, saying to Tom, "Henry Fonda, you sit over here."  He hypnotized all of them and told  them they were in an orchestra and to play the instrument of their choice.  Tom beat a drum with enthusiastic vigor.  In about ten minutes, Savard had cut the thirty down to eight remaining volunteers, Tom being one of them.

He asked each one their names, but told Tom that his name would be ee ii ee ii oh for the rest of the night, and that if he called him something else, Tom would be insistent that he call him ee ii ee ii oh.
Savard had them believing that a belt was a snake and they scurried out of the way; Tom pushed the guy next to him in front of him to protect himself.

Then each of the eight had to dance on a strip pole.  I grew anxious.  Savard saved Tom for last.
He got up, grinding his hips awkwardly, turned on the pole, his back to the audience and began to pull his pants down.  Savard ran up to him, "No, no, no, no."  The audience went crazy.

Finally, all the men were to choose porn names for their film careers (this made me anxious as well). The only one I remember is The Long Ranger.  Tom said, eeeee iiiiiii eeeee iiiiii HOOOOOH.  The audience loved the old man.

Then they brought out life-size, blown up plastic dolls, one for each man.  I cringed down in my seat.
Tom was the only one who got on the floor with that damned thing and then stood up and straddled her around his neck.

Later, a woman from the audience said to me, "I loved it when he put her legs around his neck."  I said, "Oh yeah, we do that all the time."

An hour of laughter with Peggy and Jerry.  Thank you, Tom.  Thank you, Las Vegas.


  1. This is just the best. I love you two.

  2. He’ll be feeling that in the morning!

    I truly feel for Peggy and Jerry. They will live with that image forever, likely causing dry heaves during flash backs.

    I always thought dad was a skeptic. I never would have thought he would/could be hypnotized... can't wait to hear more at dinner next week.

  3. Oh I would have loved to see that! I want to hear Tom's side of the story now. Did he have any idea when it was over just how awesome he was?

  4. What Charles said. ee ii ee ii oh my God.

  5. This is the best most hilarious story ever! I read it to my husband and he also is laughing now!

  6. What a riot. But I have to admit cowardice. This experience is like watching figure skating competitions. It's so much better experiencing the rebroadcast after you know how it all came out.

  7. I am laughing tears. The reaction from your boys is too funny.

  8. I don't believe it. Where's the video?

    1. The video is in a vault. You may see in in private with me, and then guards will return it to the vault.

  9. Way to go Tom! I would never be brave enough to volunteer. A story that will remain infamous in your family for generations to come.