Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Witness Protection: Assigned Posts [TOP SECRET]


GIZELLE: Paris, France

TALIA HENDRICA VAN DER SOMETHING: 109 St and Broadway, NYC

ELLIE CARLQUIST: San Francisco, California

SOPHIA RENEE: Cape Horn, Africa

TABITHA ROTHCHILD: penthouse, The Carlyle Hotel, NYC

DORCAS (DOWE): London, England

LESLIE JUNE: Bermuda

ELLIE CARLQUIST: Prince Edward Island, Canada

LOUISA ROOSEVELT: the Sandpad, Breukelen, the Netherlands

You will receive your instructions in the mail. Memorize, and destroy the evidence. Good luck to you all.

P.S. No returns nor exchanges.


4 comments:

  1. I changed his name to protect his innocence. Uncle Jo wishes to join Louisa Roosevelt within the Witness Proctection Program. Please consider. Talia Hendrica needs a break.

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  2. Not to quibble with your Excellency's choice to send Leslie June to Bermuda, but I am assuming this post will be to a lovely seaside hotel with full maid and food services? You see, Leslie June breaks out in hives if she has to sweat. I'm sure you understand her delicate health condition.If this is truly the case, she will happily accept your arrangements.

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  3. PS. While watching Midsomer Murders, did you notice that every episode has a sex kink thrown in? I have noticed that in other British crime shows, too. Or maybe it is in every show, every where and my radar for the tawdry is fine tuned. Must be that pesky religious upbringing.

    My favorite episode of MM is the one where his Aunt is in a nursing home and the residents are dropping like flies. I like it when he and his wife rescue her and take her to stay with them. Gives me hope that if I treat my relatives nicely, they will spring me from the lock up, too.

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  4. Dear Double O,
    Paris works for me seeing as attending Le Cordon Bleu in said city is the fondest item on my bucket list.

    Regards,
    Agent G

    ReplyDelete